Pain is an unmistakable weapon...it reassures one of the fate to come if he/she should live life wandering and sulking in evil.
Do not look into either side of the issue...follow your instinct...look toward the Grim Reaper, symbol of neutrality.
Blanket thyself in darkness...for it shall come one day. And hope that thou hast found a familiarity in darkness, lest ye shall be forever lost in that darkness.
Sanguine thirst for life ^V^^^V^
Infernal lust for knowledge
Enpowering hunger for thought
An unbinding wonder for pleasure
A lasting spirit incarnate
A confounded corrosion of interaction
Fearing that which controls my mind of endless odyssey
That burning power of light blinds that darkness which leads me
The deprivation of sleep confines my lonliness while I lay in my deeply dug grave
An everlasting addiction to blood brings forth a phantasm of horror
My darkness grows from an essence of historical value... that which grows in an elderly manner
An aspect of a tortured soul
Recognizing and living with lonliness is one of life's most dreary
aspects. Like Death, it stalks me...eating away at my emotions and
taking my sanity with it. I often ask myself, "At any rate, can lonliness
be as bad as Death?" I look all around me, sit back, sob, and answer the
obvious; yes. I look in the mirror and ask that dreary, dark, unhappy
figure in the reflection of me and ask, "What happened to me? Did I do
or say something to disappoint a higher figure?" And silence breaks
way through my words. Is there at least one person in this world who
can understand who I am, and can love me without boundaries? Through
lonliness, my mind has become a ship on an endless sea of life; forever
wandering for that someone -or at least an answer.
I follow the ideals of the Grim Reaper, yet I now find myself being stalked, in every step I take, to the ends of reality. I am falling into fantasy to escape reality. Pictures in my head of myself floating over my own funeral shoot through my thoughts. Could it be foresight, or just plain irrational thought? Could things be that bad? I don't know. Lonliness eventually conquers all; like that of Death. You cannot run.
What is it that people don't respect in me? A calm, fun, energetic soul use to encompass this shell. Now there is no glow...a weak soul. What does it all mean? Suicide is not an answer to end lonliness. But what is? Can this be answered? I'm sure it can; I just prefer not to answer it. In my eyes, I have become more dark and dreary than I have ever realized. I have seen many definitions for this feeling: lonely, self-pity, self-hatred. I have distinguished them all. But my soul cries for a match, esp in beliefs and fantasies. Will this match ever be known? I wish I knew.
And what of this image that keeps recurring in my thoughts; the one that views my own funeral? I see much sadness: mother, father, brothers, sister, beloved, friends, co-workers. Why help me after I have diminished from their world? I, myself, have failed to help myself. Why? Why? Why? ....because I wanted to feel left, and see if pain was left behind; to see how many ACTUALLY cared. Is weakness in soul a sign of a dead end to life? Could it lead to Death? When I die, I hope to meet the Grim Reaper. I do not deserve either side of immortality. But I would like to reside as Death. I feel strongly on views that would be very close to that of him...Thanatos.
Her lust is sanguine and uncontrollable. Her passion beyond belief. Those two sharp points in her teeth, sharp as hot nails...ready to sink into their material and drink the life of all life.
She will stare at her enemy like the coldest winter blast. The sharpness could cut through your soul like the scrape of her fingernail across your flesh.
Could she be the one I have craved and longed for since the beginning of my endless lust? Could she be real or an illusion? Can I match my darkness with hers?
She approaches with a hunger so strong in her eyes, that she makes me shiver at the thought of the touch. At this moment, she begins to sink her teeth into my flesh...and drink......of........my...........life................
Prepare yourself. For her moment is your eternity.